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Increase your emotional intelligence to increase your emotional well-being

Regina Barr, MBA, MA, Red Ladder Inc. | December 2022/January 2023 Footnote

Editor's note: Updated November 29, 2022

This past year I’ve been talking more about emotional intelligence than in all the years I’ve been working with people to develop their emotional intelligence — and that’s a long time.
 
COVID fears and the lockdowns of the past few years likely took a toll on your mental health — as well as that of your employees, colleagues and peers — creating cause for concern.
 
I remember reading this quote during the pandemic: “Especially with … the second wave of lockdowns coming in, we need more emotionally intelligent leaders, because we see that many people are suffering,” Alain Dehaze, former CEO of staffing group Adecco, told CNBC’s “Squawk Box Europe.”
 
Even before the pandemic, there was a great need for more emotionally intelligent leaders. Now more than ever, your emotional intelligence is critical as we continue to navigate the challenges facing our companies and our country related to a post-COVID-19 world. Doesn’t it seem like everyone is holding their breath waiting to see if there will be a new variant? No wonder that employee morale along with their mental health and well-being are at an all-time low.
 
Let’s all start talking more about emotional intelligence. I like to say that I have some and always want more. That’s the beauty of emotional intelligence. It can be developed over time. That’s the good news.

What is emotional intelligence?

Simply put, emotional intelligence is being in touch with your own feelings and the feelings of others, enough that you are effective in both your communication and your persuasive ability. It determines how effectively and competently you are able to manage your feelings and perform proficiently.
 
Here are some ways you can quickly and easily raise your emotional intelligence (EQ) and improve your emotional well-being.

Develop self-awareness

Understanding your emotions and feelings is essential to EQ. Many people with low EQ are victims of their emotions. They are unaware of how they feel and tend to blame others for their actions, reactions and outbursts.
 
My advice: Establish practices that enhance your ability to understand your emotions. Create a daily ritual for quiet reflection. Become comfortable with peace and serenity. Learning to listen and trust your inner guidance will help you remain calm in the face of challenges.

Understand your thoughts

Understand how what you think, what you do and what you say affects your feelings. Seeing these relationships is vital to being in touch with your emotions.
 
My advice: Create a “thought record. ”  This is a very simple and easy-to-manage visual tracking system. On a sheet of paper create five columns. Label them: Event. Emotion. Automatic thoughts. Images. Result.
 
By keeping a record for an extended period of time, you will become more self-aware. You’ll understand the relationship between your patterns and triggers. You’ll be more in control of your life as you raise your EQ.

Identify your assets and liabilities

Know your strengths and weaknesses. Focus on your assets from the perspective of having more to offer your team and your organization and less of a place of ego. The weakness list is valuable so we know the people to surround ourselves with, whom we might want to seek council. Being open to people with diverse ideas is a sign of high EQ.
 
My advice: Keep a running list of new skills that you develop, awards that you have received and your achievements. These are your assets. Keep a running list of people who can help you offset your weaknesses. Nurture these relationships.

Foster EQ

Develop a working environment that fosters empathy, effective communication systems, conflict management and a sense of optimism. Doing this will allow you to leverage emotional intelligence to improve workplace effectiveness.
 
My advice: Work with someone to help you implement systems that invite sharing, inclusion and support diversity.

The bottom line

You will increase EQ companywide if you are able to institute these elements in your organization. This will positively impact employee well-being, which in turn impacts everything including the bottom line.
 
Regina Barr, MBA, MA, is the founder and owner of Red Ladder Inc., Women at the Top® Network and UpStyle DIY. You may reach Regina at info@reginabarr.com or https://www.linkedin.com/in/reginabarr. Learn more about Regina and her programs at https://reginabarr.com/.

Learn more from Regina Barr

www.mncpa.org/cpe/22cf-bibr

Catch Regina Barr at the MNCPA B&I Briefings Conference (Virtual), Dec. 14. Explore how to overcome stress and burnout by strengthening your emotional resilience in her session “Leveraging Relational Capital to Enhance Emotional Resilience.”

Register for the MNCPA B&I Briefings Conference today!